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Christmas gifts and cards have long been a part of celebrating our Lord’s birth.  Even though Christmas is just a few days away, you can still share the celebration with a deployed servicemember.  Share the season of Jesus by sending an e-card to a veteran’s inbox.  There are multiple websites that make it easy for families and friends to connect.  Find one that is right for you and your loved one downrange.

Holidays are always tough when you’re deployed.  I’ve spent two Christmas holidays downrange.  Each one was difficult.  Reminders from home make a huge difference while deployed.  Take time today and send a Christmas reminder to that Soldier, Airman, Sailor, or Marine who couldn’t be home.  Share to remind them that they matter.  Share to remind them that they are not alone.  Share to remind them about the birth of Jesus, God’s perfect gift to us.

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Life is difficult for military families.  There will be a time when your loved one is called to duty away from home.  Active duty missions come in different shapes and sizes.  They may be for long training exercises that have been on the calendar for a year, an immediate call up to provide support during a natural disaster in another state, or even a deployment on the other side of the globe.  In every case, it means your service member will be gone.  Here are some tips on how you and your family can weather the storm.

Surround yourself with positive friends.  Job just isn’t another book in the Old Testament.  It shows the importance of how we deal with adversity and the power of good friends.  While Job had friends, they were not heavenly focused, nor did they give good advice.  We all need friends who will give support and encouragement (1 Thessalonians 5:11).  While it will be tempting to isolate yourself at home, get out of the house and make time to fellowship.

Create or keep a routine.  Do you have time for that new swimming class?  Are you interested in becoming a volunteer?  It’s okay to add a couple of fun items on your calendar.  Just know your boundaries and stick to your schedule.  Don’t let a deployment disrupt the rhythm of your family.  Maintain your devotion time, morning or night.  Keep the patterns that worked well prior to the deployment.  If you had a family game night on Thursday, then keep it on the calendar even if Dad is gone.  The kids also need that stability and steadiness of a routine.

Stay within the family budget.  Deployments may cause a jump in your income.  Extra money in the checking account is a blessing, but don’t yield to the spending bug.  Talk with your service member about the new income level.  Make a spending or saving plan that will honor God and your family.  Focus on your priorities.  Can you support a local homeless shelter?  Can you pay off the second mortgage or a credit card bill?  Will you need to save for a new vehicle?  Perhaps to want a romantic getaway once the deployment is finished.  Will the funds be available?  Discuss your options as a couple and stick with your plan.

Join or start a Bible study.  You have a great opportunity to strengthen your faith during this deployment.  Is there a topic that you’ve always wanted to study?  Is there a book of the Bible you just can’t make time to read?  You are not alone.  We all have questions regarding God’s Holy Word, so connect with a group of believers and dig in.  Depending on the group you join, this can be another way to connect with military spouses and family members.  Find a church or organization that offers Bible studies to military families as a specific ministry.  They are available.  Some even provide meals and child care.

Decide to strengthen your marriage.  Yes, deployments create long-distance relationships, but you can still connect with your spouse.  Have a communication plan with your spouse prior to departure or once he/she arrives at the new duty station.  Can you communicate once a day or once a week?  What time of day will you communicate?  If you are eight time zones apart, try to respect sleep schedules at home and overseas.  Webcams and video chatting make it easy to see and talk with your loved one while overseas.  These options are not available in every overseas location, but utilize the technology that will work on both sides.  Don’t forget to write either.  Nothing is like getting a letter from home during a long deployment.  It’s a keepsake that service members treasure and can carry in their uniform for frequent reminders of home.

There is no such thing as an easy deployment, but military families can utilize these self care suggestions while your loved one is gone.  Continue to pray for one another and model the love of Christ at home and abroad.

 

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It is pretty easy to get lost in the noise and busyness of shopping, decorating the house, putting up Christmas lights, baking, cleaning, making travel plans, attending office parties,  and mailing Christmas cards of course.  Look at anyone’s “to do” list this time of year and the answer seems obvious.  The Christmas season can feel more like a burden than a holiday.  We add to the seasonal stress with our desire to make Christmas “perfect” for our families.  Somehow people have bought into the idea that adding more to the holiday makes it better when the opposite is true.  This time of year is inherently hectic; now add on the stress and strain of being a military family.

You have the stress of being a single parent while your service member is gone.  When things break, you have the stress of repairing the house or finding a reliable contractor.  You have the stress of maintaining a long distance relationship.  You may also have the stress of living on one income.  It’s already difficult to stay sane this time of year, but military families have a greater burden.

Here are a couple of ways to improve your Christmas season.  First, establish boundaries.  These can be on time, finances, activities, school, etc.  Be honest on what tasks are reachable.  Recognize your limits and focus on the truly important things you need to accomplish.  If something is out of bounds, then ask for help from a friend or family member.  Evenings and weekends are limited and easily overcrowded with activities.  Dedicate time to necessary events and people.

Second, make time for those you love.  Christmas is tough when your soldier is deployed.  Make it better by spending time together on the phone, chatting online, sharing pictures, mailing care packages, or saying hello through a webcam.  Make time for your family at home.  Turn off your cell phones and give your gamers a rest.  Call it an electronic fast if need be, but spend time talking to one another eye to eye instead of sending a text message.

Third, focus on Christmas.  This is more than a consumer holiday and reindeer.  It is the celebration of Christ’s arrival on earth.  It is God fulfilling His promise of salvation to the world through Jesus, our Savior.  Angels could no longer stay silent.  Shepherds were blinded by glorious beams of light.  Wise men crossed the desert to worship Him.  And we should continue in these patterns of worship.  Whether it is telling a cashier, “Merry Christmas” or reading the Christmas story to your children, proclaim the birth of Jesus.  Whether it is dropping change in a red kettle or lighting an advent candle, let the light of Christ shine.  Whether it is a work day or the weekend, sacrifice time to worship our new born King.

We all want the perfect Christmas experience this year.  Don’t let the hectic pace of this world blind you.  Remember that the perfect Christmas had nothing to do with presents, cards, or strands of twinkle lights.  The day was made perfect by the birth of Jesus, the Son of God, our Savior and Redeemer.  May His birth continue to give you peace.

 

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