You can ask anyone about marriage and the answer will almost always be the same. I want a good, strong, happy marriage. No one stands at the altar and says, “I’ll give you the best five years of my life.”
Polls and surveys share the same information on marriage. The vast majority of people desire happy, lasting marriages, whether rich or poor, male or female, and regardless of cultural background.
The big secret about marriage is that it works. Yes, I said it, marriage works. While out-of-wedlock birth rates are high and divorce rates are higher, marriage works. Look at the last thirty years of research; married couples are happier, live longer, and build greater financial security. Children with married parents perform better in school, have better physical health, have lower rates of suicide, and experience fewer cases of child abuse. Click here for new research on “Why Marriage Matters: Thirty Conclusions from Social Science.”
Deep down, everyone wishes they could have a rewarding lifelong commitment with their spouse. But in the midst of challenges, we forget how marriage can benefit our personal lives. We are losing our determination and the skills to keep marriages healthy and strong.
February 7-14, 2013 is National Marriage Week. This time is set aside to focus on the institution of marriage and strengthen it at a national level. This is a collaborative effort that encourages groups to strengthen individual marriages, reduce the divorce rate, and build a stronger marriage culture. The website offers several marriage resources, event guides, reading lists, and videos on how to build a satisfying marriage.
As we approach Valentine’s Day, let us focus on the skills that can strengthen our relationships and keep our marriages intact. Here are a couple of goals or reminders for a healthy marriage:
- make time for each other (fun, friendship, romance)
- work as a team (instead of me vs. you)
- talk without fighting
Remember why you fell in love and think how hard you worked to maintain your romance. After marriage, we normally encounter a period of time when couples spend less time on their relationship due to kids, careers, and other factors. Take time to reconnect, go on a date, and rekindle the romance in your marriage. Use National Marriage Week as a way to strengthen your marriage and focus on the one you love.
God Squad 
Do You Have a Five Star Marriage
Posted in News & Commentary, tagged army, chaplain, five star marriage, marriage, military, National Marriage Week., pastor, valentine's day on January 27, 2015|
Do you have a five star marriage?
People want to stay at the best hotels and resorts when they travel. These hotels earn a five star rating because they consistently deliver excellent service, provide great amenities, and offer that special touch of class like little chocolates on your pillow. They go the extra mile. People instead settle for a two or three star establishment because of proximity, cost, and time. We often settle for less instead of striving for the very best.
This is also true in marriage. We can have a great relationship with quality time together, kind words toward each other, and sacrificial acts of service. But too often we settle for a mediocre marriage with little strength, support, or commitment.
How can we flip the switch?
Couples need to honestly evaluate the relationship with their spouse. Are your expectations being met? When expectations are not met, we are disappointed. Disappointment often carries with it frustration, anger, and isolation. If our reality is less than what we expected, then the reality equals a disappointed spouse. Share expectations with each other so that you are both on the same page and can work toward mutual goals.
Couples need to focus on each other. I can tell when my wife is upset, stressed out, or angry. Most of us know that look or phrase from a spouse. There is a cue that reveals his or her inner thoughts. That is a signal to ask questions, share an encouraging word, help around the house, fix a problem, take the kids for a walk, or just listen. Don’t ignore the cues and signals that your spouse sends you. Take notice. Respond and act to support each other.
Couples need time together. Husbands and wives are great at making time to discuss problems, schedule school events, and play taxi service for the kids. While this is important, couples also need to spend quality time together. They need to get away, go on a date, and make time for their one true love. Don’t lose the fire and energy that brought you to the altar in the first place.
February 7-14 is National Marriage Week. Use that time to evaluate your marriage and strengthen your relationship. Check out their resource page at http://www.nationalmarriageweekusa.org and discover how a few simple steps can improve any marriage.
No matter where your marriage is today, you can build a stronger relationship that will last for the rest of your life. Make a five star marriage part of your life today.
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